Lonesome Triggers.

Sundays in my past meant working open houses, showing houses and then a lot of eating and drinking with my husband.

I'm doing some paperwork today, but no open houses. I can't really show houses because I can't drive anywhere, so that makes going around the area difficult. I've been in the yard, weeding and mulching, while drinking LaCroix and smoking. I'm very triggered. I'd love to have a beer.

My husband is out. He went to his Mom's to help her with things, and now I can see from his phone that he's at the bar he owns. I know he always has a ton of work to do around there, so I know he's doing that, but I also know he's drinking. I don't know why this bugs me, but it does.

Sobriety is my journey and though he's a huge reason I'm doing it, I'm ultimately doing it for myself. But, it's lonely and isolating. I would go to a meeting, but I can't get there, so blogging it is.

Still Day 7. Court is tomorrow.

God, grant me the strength.